It’s that time of year again. Autumn is in the air and today is Hallowe'en! For the past few weeks, shops have been filling their windows with jack-o-lanterns, mannequins have been dressed in spooky costumes, and cheap candy seems to be on the shelves at every grocery store.
We also saw the season 5 premiere of the hit AMC series The Walking Dead return on October 12th. Every Sunday we get a zombie-fied hit of chills, thrills, gore and more. Now, as both a Western Martial Arts instructor and practitioner and a self-proclaimed nerd, it is not uncommon for myself and my friends to talk about what we would do if the zombie apocalypse were to hit. What weapon would be our first choice? Would we prefer a bow and arrow like the no-nonsense Daryl, or would we opt for a sword like the mysterious and deadly Michonne?
In this special Hallowe'en blog post, I have asked various Western Martial Artists and experts what weapons they would choose if the dead were to rise.
Weapons
Now myself, personally, I would likely go with a longsword. Longswords are great for going up against multiple opponents or taking someone on in a one-on-one fight. As a weapon that can be used for both cutting and thrusting, I feel it would be great not just against walkers, but also against unsavoury humans looking for trouble. I would take a rondel or a dagger as my secondary in case I was disarmed or for combat in close quarters with a walker, where I need a good, clean blow to the head. Although it wouldn’t have the range of a poleaxe or a spear, the longsword would be my number one choice due to its versatility. Also, as handy as guns are, a longsword does not run out of bullets!
Scott Wilson of Darkwood Armory, who is a Western Martial Arts instructor, jouster, and tournament fighter, seems to agree with me when it comes to the longsword. “Obviously the longsword is a good choice. It was a great choice against living humans for its versatility. The difference is in this case you are facing a non-reasoning creature. The weight and cutting capabilities of a longsword are very good for doing business.” However he was also a fan of using poleweapons. “A staff or spear gives you about the same thing with the spear being able to penetrate the skull easier. A staff may crack a skull, but exploding a head like [in the] movies is unlikely. If the zombie must suffer damage to the brain itself, then a spear has a better chance. Both weapons give you a better distance, but are slow and harder to use against opponents not directly in front. The lack of mass is a big issue, [so] for a staff weapon, I would choose a light axe. Better range than the longsword. Assurance that a hit to the head puts them down. But my number one personal protection choice would probably be a bar mace. Light enough to be fast, heavy damage along its entire length. Easily breaks bone and lacerates flesh.”
Luis Preto, professional sports coach and martial arts instructor, has a different preference. Luis teaches wrestling, self defense, karate and the Portugese stick fighting martial art Jogo do Pau (which he will be teaching at Academie Duello this November!) Luis is also a fan of using pole weapons, but in the case of the zombie apocalypse, he would reach for an un-bladed stick first and foremost. “The main reason boils down to the fact that, in a world that is turned upside down by zombies, I wouldn't expect to continue having bladesmiths in business. That being the case, sticks would assure me of having access to 'my' fighting weapon at any different stage. In doing so, I would obviously follow Jogo do Pau's strategy of using a long staff in open field combat and batons (either single or double) when constrained space wise."
Speaking of space, Bob Charrette has said he would fall back on the weapon that is best for creating space: the montante (a.k.a greatsword). The montante is “the weapon ancient masters advise for mass mayhem. [Considered] very useful when outnumbered with opponents on all sides--especially when they don’t have armour.” Last time I checked, most zombies in The Walking Dead don’t seem to be wearing much in the way of armour, so Bob might be on to something. Given that Bob is no stranger to the world of armoured swordplay--being the principal instructor at Forteza Historical Swordplay Guild and the author of Fiore dei Liberi’s Armizare: the Chivalric Martial Arts System of Il Fior di Battaglia--he knows a thing or two about armour and weapons. Now some would argue that wielding greatsword is “potentially tiring, but so is a longsword, and the montante comes with better reach.” So for those of us who want to really use distance and reach for our advantage, there is no question what weapon we should use.
Aaron Lamontagne of Lykopis Archery knows exactly what he would reach for and why. “For weapons, I'd have an American Flatbow with a 40lb draw weight, and compound arrows in the Yahi style with a mix of arrowheads for killing zombies, and killing game.” That’s great when you have the option for keeping a good distance but what would Aaron want for a mêlée fight? “A mix of knives for combat, and other practical considerations.”
All right, so we have covered projectile, long range, and short range weapons so far. But I can't help but feel like we're missing something....
What about Armour?
We need to consider what is most important. This will likely be gear we have to wear for many hours a day, often trekking over long distances. We need to consider how much we are willing to compromise when it comes to speed and flexibility, while also taking into account which parts of the body are the most important areas to keep armoured-up--and why.
Luis Preto’s first concerns would be with “wearing gear that would protect the back of my head, neck, back and legs (calves' tendons), since the greatest danger is always that of being attacked from behind when looking in another direction.” Definitely important for those times you are just trying to make a quick supply run and then get ambushed by an entire horde of zombies.
Most of our experts seem to agree that chainmaille (or maille/ mail), would be a good first choice. Not only would a walker’s teeth not be able to scratch or “cut” it (which would also keep the wearer from becoming infected and turning) but it’s practical too. “It is flexible for squirming through tight spaces and hard to rip off.” Says Bob Charrette. To which he adds that chainmail is also “easy to repair without specialized skills once you have links.”
Scott is also one to agree with the use of chainmail, “...especially on the limbs that can quickly be grabbed and put in a mouth. Mail would be my first choice for body protection, but solid limb protection means that you can use the armor to batter [your opponents] with. No matter what I would at least be wearing thick leather.” Scott, (who, like Daryl from The Walking Dead, is also a motorcycle man), adds: “My horsehide motorcycle jacket would be very difficult or impossible to gnaw through in any reasonable time. Gauntlets would perhaps be another thing high on the list. It is hard to hold a weapon with damaged hands.”
Aaron is another fan of light leather armour. “So, I need to gear up.” His first priorities are to be quick and mobile. What does he reach for? “A gambeson, something that covers down to my thighs or knees. And boots. Tall ones. Snakeproof boots, or thick riding boots. And some long leather gauntlets.” No one said you couldn’t fight off the walking dead while also looking dapper as can be!
Myself, I would definitely go for mail that would cover my arms, torso, and reach down to my thighs, perhaps over a light gambeson. I’d grab my metal gauntlets (made by Scott Wilson and Darkwood Armory!) and a thick pair of riding boots that went up to my knees. No matter what, you’ll be adding weight and reducing some aspects of speed and agility, but as a SwordFit coach, I think I could handle it.
So, what would you do if the zombie apocalypse were to strike? How would you arm and armour yourself up and what would be your first priorities? Share your thoughts with us and don't forget: have a Happy Hallowe'en!
Devon Boorman is the Co-Founder and Director of Academie Duello Centre for Swordplay, which has been active in Vancouver, Canada since 2004. Devon’s expertise centres on the Italian swordplay tradition including the arts of the Renaissance Italian rapier, sidesword, and longsword, as well as knife and unarmed techniques. Read more from Devon Boorman.